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Ceremony Readings
From Bread for the Journey 

Creating A Home Together

"Many human relationships are like the interlocking fingers of two hands...Human relationships are meant to be like two hands folded together. They can move away from each other while still touching with the fingertips. They can create space between themselves, a little tent, a home, a safe place to be. 

"True relationships among people point to God. They are like prayers in the world. Sometimes the hands that pray are fully touching, sometimes there is distance between them. They always move to and from each other, but they never lose touch. They keep praying to the One who brought them together."
-- Henri Nouwen


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From The Committed Marriage

"Under the chuppah (marriage canopy) we pronounce a special blessing that renders the couple loving, kind friends, always at each other‘s side, always encouraging each other, and when necessary, criticizing and gently showing where the other erred. God has endowed each of us with unique gifts. When our mates become our best friends, we pool our spiritual resources and strengthen each other. In such a relationship, life‘s trials become less threatening, and even the most formidable challenges become manageable. ‘Two are better than one‘ is the wise teaching of King Solomon. If one falls, the other is there to pick him/her up. If one is attacked, the other is there to rescue him; if one is depressed, the other is there to buoy her spirits. 

"When husband and wife are loving, kind friends, they perceive each other‘s feelings so totally that there is no need for explanations. Their relationship is virtually symbiotic. There is total empathy with the needs of the other."

-- Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis 

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From Graces by June Cotner 
A Wedding Toast 
"May your love be firm,
and may your dream of life together
be a river between two shores-
by day bathed in sunlight, and by night
illuminated from within. May the heron
carry news of you to the heavens, and the salmon bring
the sea‘s blue grace. May your twin thoughts spiral upward
like leafy vines, like fiddle strings in the wind,
and be as noble as the Douglas fir.
May you never find yourselves back to back
without love pulling you around
into each other‘s arms." 
-- James Bertolino

 
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From Rumi: The Book of Love  
Reading 1 
"The minute I heard my first love story
I started looking for you, not knowing
how blind that was. 
Lovers don‘t finally meet somewhere. 
They‘re in each other all along."

Reading 2 
One Swaying Being 
"Love is not condescension, never
that, nor books, nor any marking

on paper, nor what people say of
each other. Love is a tree with

branches reaching into eternity
and roots set deep in eternity,

and no trunk! Have you seen it?
The mind cannot. Your desiring

cannot. The longing you feel for
this love comes from inside you.

When you become the Friend, your 
longing will be as the man in

the ocean who holds to a piece of
wood. Eventually, wood, man, and

ocean become one swaying being,
Sham Tabriz, the secret of God." 
-- translated by Coleman Barks


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From The Invitation 

"It doesn‘t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart‘s longing.
It doesn‘t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn‘t interest me what planets are squaring with your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life‘s betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.
I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn‘t interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it‘s not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence. 
I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!".
It doesn‘t interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.
It doesn‘t interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand alone in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back...." 
-- Oriah
 
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From the Bhagavad Gita 
"The Beloved Lord‘s Secret Love Song"

Hear still further
    the greatest secret of all,
    my supreme message:
"You are so much loved by me!"
    Therefore I shall speak
    for your well-being.
 
Be mindful of me
    with love offered to me;
    sacrificing for me,
    act out of reverence for me.
Truly you shall
    come to me--
    this I promise you
    for you are dearly loved by me.  
 
Completely relinquishing 
    all forms of dharma,
    come to me
    as your only shelter.
I shall grant you
    freedom from 
    all misfortune--
    do not despair! 
-- translated by Graham M. Schweig


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From The Chocolate Cake Sutra Ingredients for a Sweet Life 

This is what should be done
By one who is skilled in goodness, 
And who knows the path of peace:
Let them be able and upright,
Straightforward and gentle in speech.
Humble and not conceited,
Contented and easily satisfied.
Unburdened with duties and frugal in their ways.
Peaceful and calm, and wise and skillful,
Not proud and demanding in nature.
Let them not do the slightest thing
That the wise would later reprove.
Wishing: in gladness and in safety,
May all beings be at ease!
Whatever living beings there may be;
Whether they are weak or strong, omitting none,
The great or the mighty, medium, short, or small.
The seen and the unseen,
Those living near and far away,
Those born and to-be-born --
May all beings be at ease!
Let none deceive another,
Or despise any being in any state,
Let none through anger or ill will
Wish harm upon another.
Even as a mother protects with her life
Her child, her only child,
So with a boundless heart
Should one cherish all living beings;
Radiating kindness over the entire world:
Spreading upwards to the skies,
And downwards to the depths;
Outward and unbounded,
Freed from hatred and ill will,
Whether standing or walking, seated or lying down
Free from drowsiness,
One should sustain this recollection.
-- Graham M. Schweig


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From the The Alchemist 

"When he looked into her dark eyes, and saw that her lips were poised between a laugh and silence, he learned the most important part of the language that all the world spoke -- the language that everyone on earth was capable of understanding in their heart. It was love. Something older than humanity, more ancient than the desert. Something that exerted the same force whenever two pairs of eyes met, as had theirs here at the well. She smiled, and that was certainly an omen -- the omen he had been awaiting, without even knowing he was, for all his life. The omen he had sought to find with his sheep and in his books, in the crystals and in the silence of the desert. 
"It was the pure Language of the World. It required no explanation, just as the universe needs none as it travels through endless time. What the boy felt at that moment was that he was in the presence of the only woman in his life, and that, with no need for words, she recognized the same thing. He was more certain of it than of anything in the world. He had been told by his parents and grandparents that he must fall in love and really know a person before becoming committed. But maybe people who felt that way had never learned the universal language. Because, when you know that language, it’s easy to understand that someone in the world awaits you, whether it’s in the middle of the desert or in some great city. And when two such people encounter each other, and their eyes meet, the past and the future become unimportant. There is only that moment, and the incredible certainty that everything under the sun has been written by one hand only. It is the hand that evokes love, and creates a twin soul for every person in the world. Without such love, one’s dreams would have no meaning."

-- Paulo Coelho


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From the Beyond Words Daily Readings in the ABC‘s of Faith 

“They say they will love, comfort, honor each other to the end of their days. They say they will cherish each other and be faithful to each other always. They say they will do these things not just when they feel like it, but even -- for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health -- when they don’t feel like it at all. In other words, the vows they make could hardly be more extravagant. They give away their freedom. They take on themselves each other’s burdens. They bind their live s together... The question is, what do they get in return?  

“They get each other in return... There will always be the other to talk to, to listen to... There is still someone to get through the night with, to wake into the new day beside. If they have children, they can give them, as well as each other, roots and wings. If they don’t have children, they each become the other’s child.

“They both still have their lives apart as well as a life together. They both still have their separate ways to find. But a marriage made in heaven is one where a man and a woman become more richly themselves together than the chances are either of them could ever have managed to become alone.” 
-- Frederick Buechner


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From The Awakened Heart 

“There is a desire within each of us, in the deep center of ourselves that we call our heart. We were born with it, it is never completely satisfied, and it never dies. We are often unaware of it, but it is always awake. It is the human desire for love. Every person in this earth yearns to love, to be loved, to know love. Our true identity, our reason for being, is to be found in this desire...

...love is the ‘why’ of life: why we are functioning at all, what we want to be efficient for... I am convinced it [love] is the fundamental energy of the human spirit, the fuel on which we run, the wellspring of our vitality. And grace, which is the flowing, creative activity of love itself, is what makes all goodness possible.  

Love should come first; it should be the beginning of and the reason for everything.” 

-- Gerald May


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From On Love and Loneliness 

“Love implies great freedom, but not to do what you like. Love comes only when the mind is very quiet, disinterested, not self-centered. These are not ideals. If you have no love -- do what you will, go after all the gods on earth, do all the social activities, try to reform the poor, enter politics, write books, write poems -- you are a dead human being.  Without love your problems will increase, multiply endlessly. And with love, do what you will, there is no risk, there is no conflict. Then love is the essence of virtue. A mind that is not in a state of love is not a religious mind at all; and it is only the religious mind that is freed from problems, and that knows the beauty of love and truth."

-- J. Krishnamurti


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From We: Understanding the Psychology of Romantic Love 

"Historia de un amor"
"Always you were the reason for my existence;
To adore you for me was religion...

It is the story of a love
Like unto which there is no equal,
Which made me understand
All that is good, all that is bad;
That gave light to my life,
Extinguishing it afterwards...
Oh! What a darkened life!
Without your love I will not live."

-- Carlos Almaran


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From The 22 {Non-Negotiable} Laws of Wellness 

"The greatest pursuit is not good health, unsurpassed wisdom, economic surplus, political freedom, or even faith that can move mountains.
It is the daily practice of the greatest of the non-negotiable laws of wellness, the Law of Unconditional Loving.
Unconditional, nonjudgmental loving. This is our aim, life’s single highest and most rewarding pursuit...
The highest expression of Divine Design is applied love found in loving relationships between people. Not the erotic love we see on television and in the movies but love rooted in a decision to serve. It is a dynamic state of consciousness, a giving, creative flow, and a harmony. It’s an acceptance of the human condition as perfectly imperfect. And it is a choice to love without regard to any conditions; no “ifs” are allowed in this, the greatest of laws."

-- Greg Anderson


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From The Book of a Thousand Prayers 

372
"O God, your Son Jesus began his ministry at a wedding celebration. May the joy that is experienced as two people begin a life together continue to grow and deepen through all that life has to offer along the way. May Jesus continue to transform the water of their every day to the wine of new vision, so what seems ordinary becomes transformed by love. May couples grow old together knowing the best wine is saved till last and that Jesus is the abiding guest and their companion on the way. We ask this in Jesus’ name."

-- Angela Ashwin 


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From The Dance Moving to the Deep Rhythms of Your Life 

"Take me to the places on the earth that teach you how to dance,
the places where you can risk letting the world break your heart,
and I will take you to the places where the earth beneath my feet 
and the stars overhead make my heart whole again and again.

Show me how you take care of business 
without letting business determine who you are.
When the children are fed but still the voices within and around us, shout that soul‘s desires have too high a price,
let us remind each other that it is never about the money.

Show me how you offer to your people and the world
the stories and the songs you want our children‘s children to remember, and I will show you how I struggle, not to change the world, but to love it.

Sit beside me in long moments of shared solitude,
knowing both our absolute aloneness and our undeniable belonging.
Dance with me in the silence and the sound of small daily words,
holding neither against me at the end of the day.

And when the sound of all the declarations of our sincerest 
intentions has died away on the wind,
dance with me in the infinite pause before the next great inhale
of breath that is breathing us all into being,
not filling the emptiness from the outside or from within.

Don‘t say, "Yes!"
Just take my hand and dance with me."

-- Oriah


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From Woman Prayers: Prayers from Women Throughout History and Around the World 

"Song of Songs"
"I am my Beloved‘s 
And he is mine. 
Come my beloved, 
Let us go forth into the field; 
And lodge in the villages. 
Let us go up early to the vineyards; 
Let us see whether the vine has budded, 
Whether the grape has opened, 
And the pomegranates are in bloom; 
There will I give thee my love. 
The mandrakes give forth fragrance, 
And at the door are all manner of precious fruits, new and old 
Which I have laid up for thee, O my beloved."

-- Anonymous


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From The Good Life: Truths That Last in Times of Need 

"Duty without love breeds weariness;
duty with love breeds constancy.
Responsibility without love breeds unconcern;
responsibility with love breeds concern.
Righteousness without love breeds hardness;
righteousness with love breeds reliability.
Education without love breeds contrariness;
education with love breeds patience.
Wisdom without love breeds rifts;
wisdom with love breeds understanding.
Friendliness without love breeds hypocrisy;
friendliness with love breeds grace.
Order without love breeds pettiness;
order with love breeds generosity.
Knowledge without love breeds dogmatism;
knowledge with love breeds trustworthiness.
Power without love breeds violence;
power with love breeds readiness to help.
Honour without love breeds arrogance;
honour with love breeds modesty.
Possessions without love breed avarice;
possessions with love breed generosity.
Faith without love breeds fanaticism;
faith with love breeds peacemaking."

-- Peter J. Gomes


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From Taking Our Places: The Buddhist Path to Truly Growing Up 

"Conversation is the culmination of listening.  It includes everything ... -- self-confidence, receptivity, give-and-take, even disagreement and conflict. Conversation is dialogue, real communication and communion through our words and our presence.  Founded on deep listening, deep speech, and an honest self-awareness without too much fear or judgment, conversation is a way to connect with ourselves and with each other, to enter each other’s lives and help each other heal."

-- Norman Fischer


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From Mere Christianity "I Promise You"

"The idea that "being in love" is the only reason for remaining married really leaves no room for marriage as a contract or promise at all. If love is the whole thing, then the promise can add nothing; and if it adds nothing, then it should not be made.  The curious thing is that lovers themselves, while they remain really in love, know this better than those who talk about love.  As Chesterton pointed out, those who are in love have a natural inclination to bind themselves by promises. Love songs all over the world are full of vows of eternal constancy. The Christian law is not forcing upon the passion of love something which is foreign to that passion‘s own nature: it is demanding that lovers should take seriously something which their passion of itself impels them to do. 
And, of course, the promise, made when I am in love and because I am in love, to be true to the beloved as long as I live, commits me to being true even if I cease to be in love. A promise must be about things that I can do, about actions: no one can promise to go on feeling in a certain way. He might as well promise never to have a headache or always to feel hungry."

-- C. S. Lewis


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From A Year With C.S. Lewis: Daily Readings from His Classic Works "Being in Love"

"If the old fairy-tale ending "They lived happily ever after" is taken to mean  "They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married," then it says what probably never was nor ever would be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be "in love" need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense-love as distinct from "being in love"—is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be "in love" with someone else. "Being in love" first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it."

-- C. S. Lewis


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From Sacred Voices: Essential Women‘s Wisdom Through the Ages, edited by Mary Ford-Grabowsky "A Time to Laugh"

1. Laugh when people tell a joke. Otherwise you might make them feel bad. 
2. Laugh when you look into a mirror. Otherwise you might feel bad.
3. Laugh when you make a mistake. If you don‘t, you‘re liable to forget how ultimately unimportant the whole thing really is, whatever it is.
4. Laugh with small children… They laugh at mashed bananas on their faces, mud in their hair, a dog nuzzling their ears, the sight of their bottoms as bare as silk. It renews your perspective. Clearly nothing is as bad as it could be.
5. Laugh at situations that are out of your control. When the best man comes to the altar without the wedding ring, laugh. When the dog jumps through the window screen at the dinner guests on your doorstep, sit down and laugh a while.
6. When you find yourself in public in mismatched shoes, laugh -- as loudly as you can.  Why collapse in mortal agony? There‘s nothing you can do to change things right now.  Besides, it is funny. Ask me; I‘ve done it.
7. Laugh at anything pompous. At anything that needs to puff its way through life in robes and titles… Will Rogers laughed at all the public institutions of life. For instance, "You can‘t say civilization isn‘t advancing," he wrote. "In every war they kill you in a new way."
8. Finally, laugh when all your carefully laid plans get changed; when the plane is late and the restaurant is closed and the last day‘s screening of the movie of the year was yesterday. You‘re free now to do something else, to be spontaneous… to take a piece of life and treat it with outrageous abandon.

-- Sister Joan Chittister, originally published in her book, There is a Season


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From The Legacy of Luna: The Story of a Tree, a Woman, and the Struggle to Save the Redwoods

"The trees in the storm don’t try to stand up straight and tall and erect. They allow themselves to bend and be blown with the wind. They understand the power of letting go… Those trees and those branches that try too hard to stand up strong and straight are the ones that break. Now is not the time for you to be strong… or you, too, will break. Learn the power of the trees. Let it flow. Let it go. That is the way you are going to make it through this storm. And that is the way to make it through the storms of life."

-- Julia Butterfly Hill


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From Heloise and Abelard: A New Biography

"Know indeed that the midday sun has risen for you, that the chorus of birds is rejoicing over your health...And look too how, now that this slight snow has melted, all things flourish again, the seasons will smile on them and by the grace of God there will be for us a not unfamiliar joy."
(Heloise)

"Physicists say often that the moon does not shine without the sun, and that when deprived of this light, it is robbed of all benefit of heat and brightness and presents to humans a dark ashen sphere."
(Abelard)

"To half my heart and part of my soul: what I am I entrust to you. I am yours as long as I live..." 
(Heloise)

-- James Burge


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From The Book of Life: Daily Meditations with Krishnamurti

"When There is Love, Self is Not" 
A man rich with worldly riches, or a man rich in knowledge and belief, will never know anything but darkness, and will be the center of all mischief and misery. But if you and I, as individuals, can see this whole working of the self, then we shall know what love is.  I assure you that is the only reformation which can possibly change the world. Love is not the self. Self cannot recognize love. You say, "I love," but then, in the very saying of it, in the very experiencing of it, love is not. But, when you know love, self is not.  When there is love, self is not.

"Love, I Assure You, Is Passion" 
You cannot be sensitive if you are not passionate. Do not be afraid of that word passion.  Most religious books, most gurus, swamis, leaders, and all the rest of them say, "Don‘t have passion." But if you have no passion, how can you be sensitive to the ugly, to the beautiful, to the whispering leaves, to the sunset, to a smile, to a cry?  Sirs, please listen to me, and do not ask how to acquire passion… I am talking of something entirely different -- a passion that loves. Love is a state in which there is no "me"…And how can one love if one is not passionate? Without passion, how can one be sensitive?  To be sensitive is to feel your neighbor sitting next to you; it is to see the ugliness of the town with its squalor, its filth, its poverty, and to see the beauty of the river, the sea, the sky.  If you are not passionate, how can you be sensitive to all that? How can you feel a smile, a tear? Love, I assure you, is passion.

-- J. Krishnamurti


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From Journey to the Heart: Daily Meditations on the Path to Finding Your Soul

"Let Love Be" 
You can‘t control love. It‘s impossible. It‘s like screaming and screeching and begging a rose to unfold faster, better, or differently.  
Love is an energy -- an active, living force that runs its threads through all of life, through all of the universe. But we can‘t control love. It is not its nature to be controlled...
We can open our hearts and let love run through us. We can open our hearts and receive love...Love is a powerful living force that permeates the universe and funnels through us. We don‘t lead it; it leads and guides us.

-- Melody Beattie


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From An Anthology: 365 Readings by C.S. Lewis

"No One Loves Because He Sees Why" 
No one loves because he sees why, but because he loves. No human reason can be given for the highest necessity of divinely created existence. For reasons are always from above downward.
"Love"
It is by loving and not by being loved that one can come nearest to the soul of another.

-- George MacDonald


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From Rumi: Bridge to the Soul: Journeys Into the Music and Silence of the Heart

"Any Sprig of an Herb"

"Learned theologians do not teach love.
Love is nothing but gladness and kindness.

Ideas of right and wrong
operate in us until we die.
Love does not have those limits.

When you see a scowling face,
it is not a lover‘s.

A beginner in this way
knows nothing of any beginning.

Do not try to be a shepherd.
Become the flock.

Someone says, This is just a metaphor.
But that is not so.

It is as clear and direct
as a blind man stubbing his foot
against a stone jar.

The doorkeeper should be more careful,
says the blind man.

That pitcher is not in the doorway,
replies the doorkeeper.

The truth is, you do not know 
where you are.  A master of love
is the only sign we need.

There is no better sign
than someone stumbling around
among the waterpots looking for signs.

Every particle of love,
any sprig of an herb,
speaks of water.

Follow the tributaries.
Everything we say has water within it.

No need to explain this to a thirsty man.
He knows what to do.

-- Coleman Barks
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From On Relationship

Love is something that cannot be cultivated; love is not a thing to be bought by the mind...Love comes into being darkly, unknowingly, fully, when we understand this whole process of relationship. Then the mind is quiet, it does not fill the heart with the things of the mind, and therefore that which is love can come into being.

Love is both personal and impersonal, is both the one and the many. It is like the flower that has perfume; you can smell it or you can pass it by. That flower is for everybody and, for the one who takes the trouble to breathe it deeply and look at it, a great delight.

-- J. Krishnamurti
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From The Art of Power

The Buddha spoke about four elements that constitute true love: the capacity to be kind and offer happiness, maitri in Sanskrit, compassion, the capacity to relieve suffering, karuna; the capacity to bring joy every day, mudita; and finally, the capacity of nondiscrimination, upeksha. When there is true love, there is nondiscrimination. The pain of the other is our own pain; the happiness of the other is our own happiness...To make our love meaningful, we need to nourish our bodhicitta, our mind of boundless love and compassion...First, we learn to love one person with all our understanding and insight; then we expand that love to embrace another person, and another, until our love is truly boundless.

-- Thicht Nacht Hahn
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Prayers for a Thousand Years by Elizabeth Roberts and Elias Amidon
"Rain fell today
and somewhere lotus flowers are blossoming,
So are we.
Defying the impossible
in the shelter and warmth of each other‘s hearts,
extending the night, caressing the stars,
And knowing each other‘s hearts
is our human bliss"
-- Jarvis Jay Masters


"Is this love that rushes towards the rim to meet you
A main thread in the inwardness of things?
Without it would the great externality loosen and unravel?
Is it our purpose to see and say that the world is good?
And could we have seen this and said it, beloved,
While you seemed indubitable?
I do not know.

I stand with hands dangling empty at my sides.
I have no wisdom bequeathed to me by ancestors.
The stars are equivocal, and around me
Nature is in sorest travail, weeping.

I love you.

This is the only sacred word in my keeping.
This is the last trace,
The last print in our hearts‘ waste,
Of the migration of a thousand traditions,
A thousand embodiments of wisdom.
I stand with useless hands,
And out of the transparency of my poverty,
I offer you this, my single gift"

-- Freya Matthews
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Ceremony Readings

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Trying to pin down the right ceremony readings can definitely be overwhelming. You're looking for just the right words to reflect both your feelings and your personalities, and your readings can set the tone for your ceremony, be it playful or tearful. Great resources include religious texts, poetry and plays, historical literature, children's books, movie lines, song lyrics, or even your own love letters. Not sure where to start? We've collected some great passages to help with your quest for the perfect ceremony readings.

 
Illustrations by Kristen Dudish
 
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